More than Adrift

Sitting at dinner with my best friend last week, we reminisced about middle school and high school (which we attended together)  It often comes up in our communication that we should have enjoyed the moments more when we were in them.  Why couldn't we see how fleeting those moments were?  Instead I was too busy being stressed out to enjoy it.... I can often be found looking into the future, planning, worrying... or looking backwards into the past... regretting one thing or another, wishing I had enjoyed childhood more, wishing I had realized how blessed I was.  In middle school, our youthful angst and insecurities kept us from enjoying the friendships, lack of responsibility.  In high school, there were so many missed opportunities to travel with my school, team sports I wish I would have tried out for, school plays, student government. I was too busy with boyfriends, stressed out over friendship anxiety, wishing for college to hurry here...  In college...

I think struggling with prayer is a rite of passage in faith.  Hearing "no" from my dad was hard for me as a child, and I don't think it has gotten any easier when I hear no from my heavenly father.  What if we pray for something that is noble, important, that would demonstrate His love? What if we are praying for our child's life? Our mother's health? Or something simpler, like just ONE night of good sleep... And He answers with "My grace is sufficient for you" (2 corinthians 12:9) I've been in church many times when our worship team has sung "His Grace is Enough"  I've done enough bible studies where I've learned it, heard many sermons about it, but I've never really believed it. Until today, it was a head lesson, and not a heart lesson. Is it really enough? Some days it doesn't feel like enough. When C was born, and I stayed awake night after night, nursing, rocking, crying, praying. I had to wake up at 6 am with two...

Last week, as our veggies in the garden looked a little thirsty, I helped my farming guru husband out by watering them. I felt rather proud of myself, and told him of my kindness that evening.  "See, I know how to take care of a garden too!" Unfortunately, Gibbs gave me a small, informative, lecture on over-watering plants! He says that if we water plants every day, even when I think they look "thirsty"  I take away the opportunity for them to grow deeper roots. Me: So? Gibbs: So? Plants that have shallow roots are uprooted by storms. Plants that have shallow roots don't bear very much fruit. I mean, come on, this should be obvious right?  To be fair, I grew up in West Bloomfield. We don't do much gardening there. Later that day, in my bible study, I was reading through Romans 1. It says that through the creation we can know the Creator. I've read it before, and can think of various examples, but this was so concrete and visible to me this week!...

In my attempt for complete openness, This week has not been the best for us! K has been in meltdown mode due to the ending of school and routine changes, so it's been a domino effect (first, her meltdowns, then down goes my patience, then D's attitude, then C cries because everyone else is crying...) But, we did manage to steal a few sweet moments in between, so I thought I'd share those instead of the stories of tears and frustrations :)                                                        Our super fun handprint butterflies!           Our father's card for dad (sssshhhh) from Kait, the inside reads: "I'll always be your little lady"    ...

Growing up hasn't come naturally to me. I'd say it's happened more by accident than planning. When I found out I was pregnant with K, I was not ready to grow up and leave the fun/irresponsibility of youth behind. But when you choose to have children, you choose to die to self. I think this was the first step in becoming a Christian. Learning to live for someone other than myself. But the past is a funny thing. It has a way of sneaking up unexpectedly, maybe a smell triggers a memory, a song, a restaurant. And when it does, the feelings, the hurts, the excitement, it can almost feel tangible. As a Christian, I know that my somewhat "colorful" past is something God can use to reach others, but more importantly, I know He wants me to be able to let go of it and fully move on past it. There are times that my current life doesn't "feel" fulfilling enough. I go through cycles of happiness, satisfaction, regret, and acceptance semi-frequently. Ther...

We have an accepted offer on a house!  I don't want to prematurely get excited, so I'm waiting until a few more things fall into place before getting started on packing :-)  But, it has me thinking about our finances and standard of living. My dad has always taught me the importance of living within my means. As a child, and a teenager, this was preached often, though it mattered very little to me at the time. My dad's means were relatively large, my needs were relatively small. We had a nice house, in a nice neighborhood, I attended private schools. When it came time for my license, we purchased a nice little car. We had cell phones, vacations, computers. College education was provided to me by my dad, I had a nice wedding that didn't require a loan.... Financing was rarely necessary for things. I don't say this bragging (obviously) since I had worked for exactly 0 of what I was "earning", but my dad managed to always balance home life, work life, fin...

This is really just a "what we did this week" post, but there were so many things that made me really happy, that I decided to title it differently :-) My sister in law Ang, and D, watching the dolphins at the Minnesota Zoo.  This picture makes me happy because 1) I love being with family  2) I love it that my kids have such great relationships with their aunts and uncles  and 3)  I'm so grateful for the relationship that Ang & I have now. We have both overcome many obstacles but now are quite wonderful friends!  A mother in law who has enough energy (even with a broken kneecap) to tour the zoo with us!! Yay for beautiful flowers growing outside my house, and a recycled bottle to put them in :) Projects!! I love art projects with the kids.  After seeing the awesome aquarium at the MN zoo, we were inspired to make our own in the kitchen.  K painted some seaweed, and a jelly fish, and D painted a few fish and a whale.  Very fu...